Wednesday, May 26, 2010

It's a BOY!!!

That's right...Jim and I are going to be proud parents of a son! I really can't believe it. I thought for SURE that I was going to have a girl. Of course, my husband had it right all along...which I don't get to say much:) We went to the doctor last Thursday. I couldn't wait. Neither of us could sleep the night before. We woke up bright and early and headed over to Duke Perinatal. Luckily, we were the first appointment. As soon as they called us back, I was suddenly nervous...the "what if" game started ringing in my ears. What if something is wrong? What if...what if...what if...
As soon as the ultrasound tech began the ultrasound, I saw my baby. I could not believe it. There really is a baby in there. My eyes filled with tears. That's my child!!!
As the ultrasound tech pointed out everything...heart, brain, legs etc, all I was thinking was IS EVERYTHING OK?? She said the doctor had to go over all that with us. The second thought running through my mind was...Well..is it a girl or a boy? Finally that moment arrived, and sure as day it was a boy. He was not shy:) Again, I became misty eyed (imagine that). I don't think I have ever experienced that much joy in one moment. Me, a mother. Me, a mother to a son.
Finally the doctor came in and told us that he was developing perfectly:):) What beautiful music to my ears. I think I could have stared at the ultrasound screen forever. I couldn't take my eyes off that wiggly worm inside of me. I even told Jim that I wished we could have one of those in our house. When we left, we wanted to tell EVERYONE!
I feel so incredibly blessed to be this little one's mom. I feel so overjoyed that I have a life growing inside of me. This is what I have always wanted. I have always wanted to be a mother; I believe it's God's plan for my life. I am so thrilled to be starting my family with the man God created for me as well. I have the best husband anyone could ask for, and I KNOW he will make the best father to this little boy. Only 20 more weeks until we get to meet this little guy!!

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

The Decision to Start a Blog

I like to read other people's blogs. In fact, I think sometimes it's a little obsessive. Most of the blogs that I read are by my friends who have babies. Which brings me to my reason for starting a blog. I'm pregnant! I guess the reason I want to start a blog is because, currently, I am so full of different emotions that I just need somewhere to write them down, and maybe I will have some followers...but that's really not the reason I am giving into the trend of bogging. I want to remember these 9 months. I want my child to be able to look back and know just how much this beautiful gift means to me.

So...here's the journey so far....

I found out I was pregnant on February 16. Work had been extremely difficult for me at the time....and that's about al I will say about that. Anyway, I was desperately praying that God would work everything out for me. And to be completely honest, I was having a VERY trying time trusting that God really did know what he was doing. And so, one day, I came home from work, Jim was making dinner, and i took a pregnancy test. I didn't really have any suspicion that I was pregnant, the test was just under the bathroom sink. I could not believe it when those 2 lines appeared on that stick. I just remember saying, "JIM!!" and him replying, "I'm busy making dinner, " to which I replied, "IT'S IMPORTANT!!!" We both looked at each other and smiled. I'll never forget that moment because it was the moment when everything changed for me. Life was put into perspective immediately. We went to the doctor the next day, and the pregnancy was confirmed. We were absolutely elated. I wanted to tell everyone! There is a little life inside of me who has completely changed my life already. No longer do the worries I used to hold so dear amount to anything anymore. I am going to be a mom. I am starting my family. God has the perfect plan. It sounds so cliche, but it is so incredibly true, and I am so incredibly grateful. I think about this little life constantly. I am pretty sure that I have never felt this way about anything. I have this new found joy. and then, the other day a thought came to me....the deepest love, overwhelming joy, and nervous excitement I have for this baby is exactly how God, my father, feels for me!

No, the past 17 weeks haven't been all bliss. I have been sick, tired, worried, and stressed. But God gave me this gift, and I have never been more thankful for anything in all of my life.

Plus...we find out if baby Ranieri is a little lady or a little man TOMORROW! We are so excited! Stay tuned.